flutter.

that first flutter
a rip current
ankle-deep
pretending to be harmless
while it learns the weight of me

my heart steps forward
willing to drown
already tasting the salt

my mind clings to the shore
remembering every pull
that swore it was sanctuary
and left me coughing up the dark

so i let it touch me
wrap around my calves
just enough to feel its pull
not enough to give it my breath

it’s more than the rush
more than just liking the way it feels

you look me in the eye
you hear me

you ask when you’re unsure
not to corner me
to know me

you speak with intention
and anchor it steady
like there’s no storm
that could make you look away

and god

that kind of patience isn’t soft
it’s a hand on my spine
guiding me deeper
knowing i’ll follow

if that’s not enough
to pull me under
then i am already gone

-s